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23_13 | It's like scared. I don't know. Hopefully, it will help. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_15 | Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_17 | Um, I thought that they'd be better, but 'cause I thought I'd have to kind of be independent and I suppose actually a lot worse. So I'm-I'm just kind of staying in the house a lot. I don't really have any friends or anything. I mean my family come and visit a bit, but it's not-- I don't know. It's kind of scary because I've just been kind of-- that should just end the flight by myself, which I always thought I'd like, but I don't actually like it. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_19 | Um, I mean, I'm-I'm a photographer. Um, so I kind of-- It's-it's been stopping me a bit, my anxiety, from being able to get work and because every time, you know, there's, uh, an opportunity that is kind of involving me having to interact with people, I just tend to just turn it down. So it was kind of making things hard in that respect and um, just kind of friends wise and everything. I just feel like I'm just kind of increasingly more alone. So it's kind of stopping me from making friends and, you know, like relationships and stuff. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_21 | Yeah, yeah. Um, it was kind of easier when I was at home because I was obviously, I mean, my parents, so it's fine, but you know, they would, I'd go to places with, um, or I'd kind of have people there, but more and more, I'm just finding myself just staying in a lot. I mean-- I went like two weeks ago for coffee with my friends and the whole time I was just kind of wanting to go home again. So I don't, I just don't want to-- I don't want that to happen. I don't want to lose everyone. So- | neutral | communication behavior |
23_23 | Yeah. Um, yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_25 | Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_27 | Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_29 | Uh, I guess I'd finished school about a year before that. Um, and I mean, I-I've always been a bit shy, um, at school, but it was never ever, uh, like it didn't really affect the things as much as not at all as much as it has been doing the last few years ago, I guess. It just started when I- like my friends went to university, and, I don't know, I felt like I was expected to kind of move out or do something and then it just kind of escalated from there.I just stop going to parties or I'd just say no to invitations or I don't know, I thought my job would help because I mean, I love it. I've- I really like doing photography, but I'm just kind of getting less and less work as it goes on, so, which is my thing, you know, but— | neutral | communication behavior |
23_31 | I guess when it- I have to kind of be working with other people. Um, I don't like that. It's like when I'm trying to kind of- would do an event or something where there's a lot of people there, not just photographers, but actual, you know, if I'm like taking places with people that I don't know, I just kind of find myself saying, you know, I mean, I want to do them, but just is scary. So I just don't do it. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_33 | Um, just, I mean, I get really hot and sweaty, and I don't-- I feel like everyone's kind of looking at me and thinking that I'm just like really stupid, and I feel like they're all going to be staring and thinking, I just can't do my job. And I'm just an idiot. And I mean, they'll think that I just look like a weirdo and I just try and-- I mean, I just kind of just try and get out of the situation or just focus on something else. So that's why I like doing shots where it's just me and the camera 'cause I- then I can just put all my attention on that instead of having to, you know, be with other people. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_35 | Um, just makes me feel like an idiot, makes me feel like I just shouldn't even bother trying to do it anymore. I should just go home and I just-- I think I just don't want to be in that situation. I just feel like everyone else is fine and they're normal and I'm just the freak, you can't, like do normal things and— | neutral | communication behavior |
23_37 | Um, like a work situation or just--? | neutral | communication behavior |
23_39 | Yeah. I was doing a job where it was kind of like a- a Nature issue and I was having to work with a lot of different people. Um, and, um, when they told me about the job, I thought it would be fine. I thought it was just going to be a few other photographers, but there were actually people and, you know, I was taking photos of people kind of in the trees and stuff like that. And I guess- they asked me to, um— | neutral | communication behavior |
23_41 | Yeah. Yeah. It was a fashion thing. I think it was for some kind of-- I'm not sure if it was a campaign or something, but, it was- | neutral | communication behavior |
23_43 | Yeah, it was, yeah, it was really cool, but I find it- found it really hard to try and focus on that 'cause I was so- I was kind of feeling really anxious and— | neutral | communication behavior |
23_45 | No. No. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_47 | That was two weeks ago. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_49 | Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_51 | I just felt really- just really kind of hot. I couldn't really breathe and just felt like I wanted to just get out. And I was kind of trying really, really hard to just focus, and just, you know, like kind of hold the camera and just not think about anything, but I just felt like everyone was looking at me and like, when they'd say 'action' and they're trying to get me to start and I was just felt like everyone was just thinking I was really stupid and I shouldn't have been there and— | neutral | communication behavior |
23_53 | Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_55 | Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_57 | I was just trying to focus on it. I was just thinking if I could just hold it really tightly, it would just-- I don't know. I'd kind of just be able to just get through it and just focus. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_59 | Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_61 | Cause I felt like I was getting really like hot and flushed and I just thought, at least if I can just-- I don't know. It sounds weird, but I was just trying to keep my hands still on it. 'Cause my hands were kind of sweaty and like shaking like loads, like, and I could just tell everyone was looking and they could see, and I just thought if I just managed to hold onto it, it wouldn't be as noticeable, but— | neutral | communication behavior |
23_63 | Just-- I was just, just stupid and it was just really-- just felt really like kind of- like everyone was just going to be staring and just thinking that I-- Like- I just felt like everyone was looking at me and just, they could tell. And then just thinking of what was she doing? | neutral | communication behavior |
23_65 | I was just really like sweaty and just— | neutral | communication behavior |
23_67 | Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_69 | Yeah, um, I was trying to wear black so this kind of tries to cover it up and just like a lot of layers, so they can't tell but, I mean, my hands, like, they were so shaken. I was really red and just was-- Just wishing that I just wasn't there. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_71 | I think just very stupid and, like, I think my face was really red. I could feel it flushing and I knew that I'd- I was probably sweating and shaking, like my hands were definitely really really shaking. Um, and af-- it was, like definitely really noticeable. Everyone could definitely see. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_73 | Um, well, I again was trying to grip the camera, just look down, just trying not to do anything weird or-- 'Cause, I mean, they could probably tell I was being weird anyway, but hopefully if-- I just- I just tried really hard to just focus and look down, not trying, like not kind-- look at anyone else and just, yeah, just kind of trying get on with it as best as I could, but— | neutral | communication behavior |
23_75 | Yeah, no, I-I always do that even if it's really hot or I wear just loads of layers and just 'cause otherwise I- I'll just be really sweaty and like, people would definitely be able to see, so. | neutral | communication behavior |
23_77 | Um, well, it kind of went on for like an hour or so, and then, um, people were going, um, just a-after every shoot people go out for drinks after just to kind of celebrate like that we've done it. I'd just- I went home straight away, just got on my car and went home. I just didn't want to be around them especially after they would've seen me being weird and I just wanted to get-get home straight away. | neutral | communication behavior |
24_1 | Yeah, I hope so. Um, my workplace has just gone smoke-free. I-I'm not-not very happy about it. I'm gonna keep smoking, but I was wondering if there's anything that-that can help me like get through the day. It's like, you know, go get my beer and smoke cigarettes after work. | sustain | communication behavior |
24_3 | No. I'm not gonna quit smoking. I mean, I like it. It helps me relax. So, I mean, I don't see what the big deal is. | sustain | communication behavior |
24_5 | I mean, I smoke a little less than a pack a day. It's not too bad. Um, I've probably smoked for the last five years, but I-I-I mean, could quit if I wanted to, but I don't really want to right now. | sustain | communication behavior |
24_7 | Sure. I can quit. | change | communication behavior |
24_9 | Well, I mean, I don't see why I couldn't, I-- although I have not ever tried to quit, it's just something that I do for fun, you know, on breaks at work, in the morning, and after work. | sustain | communication behavior |
24_11 | I am probably a two. I-I haven't even thought about quitting and until this great announcement at work today, I- I'm totally not gonna quit smoking. | sustain | communication behavior |
24_13 | Well, I mean, anything's possible. I mean, I-I guess I could maybe be convinced. Yeah. Is there some-- I mean, are there things I can try that would make me like want to quit smoking? | change | communication behavior |
24_15 | Okay. Well, that’s good information. I mean, I'm not gonna do anything today. I just need to know my options, but that's encouraging. If I decided to quit smoking, I-I do have at least tools to help me. | sustain | communication behavior |
24_17 | I don't know. I guess if my friends, like if one of my friends decided to like quit with me, that would probably help too, but I-- all my friends love to smoke, so I don't see that happening in the near future. | sustain | communication behavior |
24_19 | That's a good point. I hadn't really thought about that. That-that's a good idea. Yeah. | change | communication behavior |
24_21 | Okay. Well, thanks a lot. | neutral | communication behavior |
25_1 | Um, I really want to start working out again. Definitely wanna get back in it, have a routine, and just be healthy. | change | communication behavior |
25_3 | Um, I'm sick of feeling the way I do. I feel kinda sluggish. Especially with the winter coming, I think I want to have more energy. | change | communication behavior |
25_5 | Um, I don't like the way my clothes fit or don't fit me. | change | communication behavior |
25_7 | Just, I don't feel comfortable. | change | communication behavior |
25_9 | Mm-hmm. | neutral | communication behavior |
25_11 | Um, I know exercise is-- in the past, has always made me feel good. I felt good about myself, and just in general, exercise, I know, makes me feel good. I want to be a good example for my kids. I want them to feel like that's a part of life- | change | communication behavior |
25_13 | -exercising. So, I want-- I really just want to go get back in a routine. | change | communication behavior |
25_15 | Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
25_17 | Um, I don't know. I'd probably have to sit down maybe with my husband and try to figure out a good time for me to be able to do that, where he'd be home with the kids and I'd be going to do that, whether it's morning-time, evening, maybe the weekends. | change | communication behavior |
25_19 | Just to find the time to be able to do it, or what works in our schedule. | change | communication behavior |
25_21 | Right, yeah. | change | communication behavior |
25_23 | Mm, I would like to say a seven or an eight, that that's how important it is to me. | neutral | communication behavior |
25_25 | Because I'm really sick of being overweight. | change | communication behavior |
25_27 | Not ha-- I just don't like being unhealthy. It doesn't make me feel good, so I'm motivated to change, it's just getting there. | change | communication behavior |
25_29 | Exactly, yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
25_31 | Mm, I'll probably, I don't know, find-- Now, while it's still somewhat okay outside, maybe pick days I'm gonna go for walks or runs, um, maybe look for a gym close to the house so that I know I can go there quickly or maybe that has daycare, um, yeah, maybe I'll just start to look for that, and find ways I can do it first. | change | communication behavior |
25_33 | Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
26_1 | I just want my call, that's it. | neutral | communication behavior |
26_3 | [scoffs] Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
26_5 | I don't know. Some of-- One of the officers, it's like he has it out for me or something. I don't- I don't know what it is. Something about me not making my bed, something about my attitude. I don't know, I just want my call, man. | neutral | communication behavior |
26_7 | I just wanna contact my mom, that's it. | neutral | communication behavior |
26_9 | My dad's birthday is tomorrow. | neutral | communication behavior |
26_11 | And I just wanted my call so I can talk to my mom. That's it. | neutral | communication behavior |
28_1 | Thank you, my doctor [unintelligible 00:00:05] | neutral | communication behavior |
28_3 | Well am having, um-- I've been an ongoing problem with smoking and trying to quit. | change | communication behavior |
28_5 | Oh I've been wanting to, for a long long time in years. | change | communication behavior |
28_7 | Well I have a 15-year-old daughter and she's highly against it. And, um, health issues, you know, I'm getting-- not getting any younger and I have asthma and I have chronic bronchi-- bronchitis and, um, I'm having a hard time breathing when I exercise and not to mention it's socially unacceptable really. | change | communication behavior |
28_9 | Actually it's like being a leper in a non-leper colony. | change | communication behavior |
28_13 | Right and, um, she's been expressing, you know, she walks in and she's like shhh and it's embarrassing for her friends and, um, and in-in turn, it's embarrassing for me. | change | communication behavior |
28_15 | Right right, yeah. | change | communication behavior |
28_17 | Oh and emphysema the beginning stages of emphysema. | change | communication behavior |
28_19 | Thank you. | neutral | communication behavior |
28_21 | I really couldn't tell you, um, I remember when my daughter was like five, um, I was-- it was humid out and I have a problem with humidity- | neutral | communication behavior |
28_23 | -you know, for breathing, um, and, um, I was trying to stick my head out the window to gasp for air- | neutral | communication behavior |
28_25 | -and my daughter became so frightened that she went next door to our neighbor and called 911 and it really— | neutral | communication behavior |
28_27 | Yeah-Yeah she's very intelligent, yeah. Um, and they came they took me, you know, on this chair type of thing in my robe and my daughter was in sure panic, um, thinking she's was gonna lose me and she's 15 so its been 10 years since then and I still I've tried this Chantix- | change | communication behavior |
28_29 | -unsuccessfully, uh,-- | sustain | communication behavior |
28_31 | Well, um, I don't know if it's my lack of willpower but, um, also had ve-very bad side effects from it so. | sustain | communication behavior |
28_33 | Um, I had nightmares- | sustain | communication behavior |
28_35 | -nausea- | sustain | communication behavior |
28_39 | Right and it didn't stop me from smoking as well, so that's, uh, [laughs]— | sustain | communication behavior |
28_41 | Um, that was about two to three years ago. | neutral | communication behavior |
28_45 | I would get a, um, a new prescription refilled thinking, "Oh I could try it this time." | change | communication behavior |
28_47 | And I had friends that it worked for- | neutral | communication behavior |
28_49 | Um, and there is a support group that they have that you can go online or call- | neutral | communication behavior |
28_51 | -but of course I didn't do either but- | sustain | communication behavior |
28_53 | -um— | neutral | communication behavior |
28_55 | No. Yeah. | neutral | communication behavior |
28_57 | And agitation really- | sustain | communication behavior |
28_59 | -because, um, you know, um, being at my age I'm going through the menopause stage which is part, you know, you'll have that anyways and then having 15-year-old that causes a little bit more stress so you don't need any extra stress, I don't think, as far as I'm concerned. | sustain | communication behavior |
28_61 | Right, exactly. | sustain | communication behavior |
28_63 | Only when I was in the hospital. [chuckles] | neutral | communication behavior |
28_65 | And even then I-I snuck out and had a cigarette, you know. | sustain | communication behavior |
28_67 | Oh God, I would have to say, uh, three days. | neutral | communication behavior |
28_69 | But it was not really by choice, it was by, um, the situation I was in, I wasn't able to smoke so, yeah. | sustain | communication behavior |
28_71 | Right. | sustain | communication behavior |
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